Oh Valentine’s Day, you sneaky little jerk. You’re the epitome of dichotomy, Shakesperean sonnets being recited by guys who can’t spell Shakespeare and the international day of mourning for those who are single. You boost the world’s quantities of depression and love in the same day that you skyrocket sales for Hallmark, florists, Blockbuster’s romance section and Lean Cuisine dinners for one.
Well, Ed Board could rant for the next four paragraphs about the commercialization of a once-pure holiday or give you tips for that big night out, but today we’re going to play things differently. Instead, lean back with the ones you love, curl up in front of the fire and soak up a story of true romance. Oh yeah, and there’s some stuff about space travel, attempted murder and adult diapers in there, too.
Our story of affection begins in Orlando, Fla. on Feb. 5. That day Lisa Nowak, a married mother of three who flew on a space shuttle in July, was arrested and charged with attempted murder and accused of hatching a bizarre plot to kidnap Colleen Shipman. Nowak believed Shipman was romantically involved with William Oefelein, a space-shuttle pilot.
Nowak drove 900 miles from Houston to Florida using adult diapers to cut down on bathroom stops (smart thinking) to confront Shipman about her part in the supposed love triangle.
Police said Nowak confronted Shipman in her car at the Orlando airport and sprayed something at her, possibly pepper spray.
At first the astronaut was charged with attempted kidnapping and other counts, and a judge permitted her release on bail. Then, in a surprise move, prosecutors upped the charge to attempted murder, basing it on the weapons and other items they said they had found with Nowak or in her car: a pepper-spray package, an unused BB-gun cartridge, a steel mallet, knife, rubber tubing and large garbage bags.
Now it would be easy to write this off as just another tale of someone inexplicably snapping like Kramer, but we’ve got the suspicion that there’s more to it than that. Nowak was married, had kids and a respectable job that kept a roof over her head. So why throw it all away to go almost 1,000 miles with a “My First Murder” kit to kidnap and possibly kill someone? The answer is easy: love.
Who’s to say she was really crazy at all? Haven’t we all done some pretty nutty things for the ones we adore? Granted, they’ve never been on this scale before. While all might be fair in love and war, moderation is still something you should practice, but you have to admire Nowak’s courage. The courage to say “no” to conventional plumbing, the courage to say “no” to continuing her “normal” life and the courage to go insane – with love.
