With all the conveniences of the 21st century making everything fast and available in seconds, why do people think the art of dating and meeting that “special someone” should also be fast and available in an instant?

Instant coffee, instant breakfast, instant Internet…instant love? Remember in high school when Kimmy and Mark met Friday then the next week they were “going out?” They held hands at the pep rally and then two weeks later they had a huge public breakup in the middle of the quad. Kimmy thought her life was over.

That might have been a little melodramatic, but I am not far off from the typical scene. What is sad is dating or relationships, whichever term you wish to use, is not that different in college. You meet, jump into a relationship and immediately intertwine your lives before even getting to each other’s possibly clashing political views.

Let me make it abundantly clear: Dating does not mean a relationship! You cannot go from one date with a person to being in a relationship and then be really surprised when it doesn’t work out.

The art of dating is getting to meet people to see what qualities and characteristics you like or do not like in the opposite sex. Eventually you find someone you can stand to date long enough to realize it’s more than just chemical attractions, laughing at funny one-liners and hanging around that person for the next 50 or 60 years could be a good time.

Just because you go on one date with a guy or girl doesn’t mean you have to go on another one with them or jump into a “relationship.”

My mom told me to “date around” in college, and my initial reaction to this was positive, but I wondered: Why would I “date around” if I was just going to end up being called a “slut” or a “whore.”

“Dating around” is not the same as sleeping around, ladies and gentlemen. If you go on a date and his jokes or her annoying laugh makes you want to run, screaming for the door, thank them for going out with you, be friends, and leave it at that.

But that doesn’t seem to be the consensus anymore. If a girl or guy goes on a date with different people, it’s as if they are automatically breaking some rule.

Dating should be fun and relaxed and a learning experience for all involved.

Web sites like match.com or directdating.com, or any of the other million dating Web sites that guarantee they can find you the love of your life, are just rubbish.

Why would anyone trust a Web site to find a potential spouse when most of us can barely trust ourselves to see through the facades most people put up?

But very few people seem to be on the same page when it comes to the idea of love and romance or the practicalities that should be involved. I think if a guy came up and asked to get a cup of coffee with me, I might be so genuinely taken aback I wouldn’t know what to do as I am so used to the “I’ll call you,” technique in which I receive text messages left and right until it feels like he really is my boyfriend.

Things like Facebook and MySpace have taken the fun out of even flirting because flirting via the Internet is just dang creepy. If someone is Internet-flirting with you, wonder why they aren’t doing it in person.

Dating has become something people do just as lazily as going to Burger King with the kiddies instead of cooking something healthy.

The wonderful yet archaic idea of courtship has finally caught up with the 21st century in all its grotesque high-speed glory. So, Prince Charming if, you’re out there, Facebook me?

About the writer:

Rachel Carey is a sophomore political science major. She can be reached at [email protected].