Laughing at criticism

I recently stumbled upon Front Burner, a bulletin containingconversations about Dallas among the editors of D Magazine —a blogspot, if you will. For those of you who don’t know whatD Magazine is, it’s like the InStyle of Dallas.

I found that my name was mentioned in a couple of posts, whichmade me fall out of my seat laughing. Apparently,”Confessions of an under-age drinker” didn’tquite fly with them. Hey, at least I’ve gained somenotoriety.

I suppose I don’t have any real and informed opinions tostir up any debate. I simply give people something to read duringclass. What I write about is stupid, and it’s kind of hard toargue with stupidity. In all honesty, do you really want to make anargument against topics like SMU pickup lines and penny stocks?Those are more like random tangents, not even topics. Nevertheless,as long as I have something to say, there will always be someonewith some degree of disposition. Hey, everyone is entitled to theiropinion, as I am to mine. I just choose to execute that right intelling them that their opinion is wrong.

One thing is for sure: I can always count on the editors of DMagazine to contribute their two cents and a French fry’sworth of an opinion.

A gaggle of RE:s

• “Good God. If stick-pinning a hamster to acorkboard and shocking its nipples with a car battery would stopjust one kid from smoking, I’d do it every weekend. PETAdrives me nervous. When I start shocking hamsters, I’m goingto invite that crazy Ann Truong over to the house. I’ll showher how a real alcoholic operates. She’s got a lot tolearn.”

Okay. So now I’m Crazy Ann Truong, and I’ve gotquite a bit to learn. Please, invite me over when you startshocking hamsters, and teach me all that I need to know. I’mready to learn.

• “Ah, the easy confidence of college students. Here,an under-21 SMU coed plows into her many definitions of alcoholism:”You know you’re an alcoholic when…” Her piecereads more like a list of beat-down truisms and dubiousobservations than anything personal — like she’s beenaround booze for maybe a year and been drunk about, oh, twice.I’d guess the paper is running it as a sort of collegecommunity service announcement. Okay, then.”

Ha! I’ve been around booze for two years, and I’llhave you know I’ve been drunk three times,thank-you-very-much.

Geez ‘n’ peas, people. Don’t take what I writeso seriously. If you don’t know by now that my writing servesto entertain and not educate, then you’re taking me tooseriously In fact, you’re taking yourself too seriously. Hi,it’s called a sense of humor. Get one. And while you’reat it, look up Humor’s cousin, Sarcasm. Oy, tough crowd.

I’ve always been the one to believe that everything inthis world is beautiful until proven crap. And a few things havebeen proven crap already. So how shall I take on the world? Why,with a sense of humor, of course. All you can do is laugh and hopethat someday, you can catch life off guard for a brief moment soyou can walk by, kick it in the crotch and say, “How do youlike them apples?”

The harsh cruelties of this world can trample all over me, butit’s all good I’m going to conquer the world someday,and when I do, oh how they’ll pay. But in the mean time, I amgoing to laugh.

Wow. So this is what criticism is like, huh? Oh well. I wonderwhat’s for dinner.

Ann Truong is a columnist for The Daily Campus. She maybe reached at [email protected].