People who know me know that there are few things about SMU that I don’t like.

People who know me well also know there are a few things about SMU that I absolutely loathe.

One of those things is the much dreaded “Phony Pony.”

Somewhere down the history of SMU, some poor marketing person drew a very sickly looking Peruna and propagated it across the campus and beyond.

You know the drawing I’m talking about. You’ve seen it countless times.

To this day, the Phony Pony lurks around corners and in dark alleyways, rearing its ugly head every now and then.

For a school that is so focused on its image (SMU has a 58 page Branding Guidelines document available for download at http://smu.edu/brand/), you would think that they could eradicate this menace from our campus.

Unfortunately, he has snuck his way into some buildings on campus even, such as Dedman Center for Lifetime Sports. Oh the horror.

Rarely does a week go by when I don’t see the Phony Pony ruin an otherwise perfect piece of SMU apparel.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to put an item from the bookstore back on the shelf because the Phony Pony appeared during the design process.

How can you spot this menace, you might ask?

How can you uphold the proud tradition of the Peruna logo?

Well, the easiest way to spot this ne’er-do-well is by its neck, mane and tail.

The Phony Pony has a straight vertical line going from its front leg to its neck that then arcs over to his snout.

The real Peruna does not have this vertical line, his neck simply arcs from his leg to his snout.

The Phony Pony has a few wiry strands of pointy hair that apparently qualify for a mane.

The real Peruna has a nice, full mane worthy of an SMU Mustang.

The Phony Pony has a crook in its skinnier tail, as well. Essentially, the Phony Pony looks like a gelding on its deathbed.

This sickly horse is more suited to a being a petting zoo pony than a fierce mascot.

On a more serious note, I truly do hope that the SMU marketing department can continue to rein in this nuisance and put the real Peruna in his rightful place as SMU’s logo.

It is just unacceptable to have this problem after so many years.

A few years ago, UNT completely overhauled their school colors, logo and more, yet they don’t have this seemingly uncontainable issue.

I know ther are always a lot of fires to put out at any given moment that push back things like this, but I really hope that we can finally end the Phony Pony once and for all.

Getting rid of the Phony Pony in Dedman Center and in the bookstore would be a good place to start.

Side note: while we’re talking about logos and such, don’t ever mistake the Ford Mustang for Peruna.

How can you remember? “Peruna runs to the right.” Sorry, pet peeve of mine.

Hopefully now, with your newfound knowledge, you can help combat this Phony Pony menace and rid our campus of him.

Real Peruna is SMU’s one and only mascot. No geldings or Phony Ponies can change that.

Brad is a junior majoring in mechanical engineering.