Lack of age-appropriate footwear leaves boys with few other options

Boys, it’s time to slip off those Rainbows and tie up those…New Balances? Gucci loafers? Dockers? What are the options? You can’t live in sandals and tennis shoes forever, now. But it has come to my attention that when the going gets cold, your options are a’dwindling.

It’s no surprise that winter makes dressing difficult. With the lack of motivation to go to class with the constant downpour, the end-of-the-semester blues, and the convenience of naps fighting right in between classes, dressing up (or down) for class is not an easy task.

I’m sure guys do not spend nearly as much time deciding what to wear to class, as they probably pick up whatever pants and shirt are lying on the floor (or wearing the same pants to class they wore to the bar the night before, which is a story all it’s own). But wearing tennis shoes and sandals get old, real fast. Especially when Friday (OK, Thursday) night comes around, and the rain is pouring down, sandals are really the last thing on your mind or feet.

I almost feel bad for you guys and your lack of shoe selection, I really do. There is no middle ground. Sandals, tennis shoes or designer loafers? What is that about?

I did some research in hopes of finding additional options without getting pneumonia or breaking the bank. I checked numerous online shops, as well as those feet walking by. And let me tell you, there are a lot of bad looking shoes out there, unless you’re approaching 30.

Let’s start with loafers. This is going to be fun, right? There are a lot of options with these comfort shoes, and I’m sure they look great with jeans, but it sure is hard to distinguish between what looks “manly” and what looks a step over being metrosexual. There are “Driving Loafers” at various price points by many different designers. I’m not sure why they’re called “Driving Loafers” exactly, maybe they’re great for long road trips?

With sneakers, I must say I’m partial to the New Balances. But actually there are other choices out there. Surprising, I know. My dad, of all people, has a pair of Diesel “aggressive walking” shoes. They almost look like climbing shoes with a bit of old-school spin. And if my dad can get away with them, I’m sure all you college boys can too.

Kangaroo, or ‘ROO shoes, are making a come back circa 1982. Bright colors and mix-matched laces add some liveliness to the dreary rainy days. And of course Pumas are always an option. Asics also have really cool retro sneakers that are a little sparkier than your usual gray tennis shoes.

“There is no in between for Will,” Michelle Chidoni, senior CCPA major said of her boyfriend’s “selection” of shoes. “Everything for Will is a ‘New Balance Occasion.’ Wedding? ‘New Balance Occasion.’ Formal? ‘New Balance Occasion.’ It’s just funny.”

Guys, you need to bring a girl when shopping for shoes. Just because a shoe is expensive, does not, repeat after me does not mean it looks good. There is such a thing as too metrosexual. And some shoes are made for an old man, not a college boy. These things include shoes with tassels, which are not OK if you’re under 30.

Elizabeth George, junior real estate finance major said, “A lot of guys buy these expensive funky shoes and think they look cool because they buy them from a trendy store and cost a lot. But they’re not.”

Moral of the story: I don’t know, actually. I feel bad for you boys. See, girls have lots of option in terms of getting dressed. For us, there are sandals, high heels, low heels, open-toes sandals — still got your attention? The point is there are a select amount of acceptable shoes for guys under 30 to wear. And even fewer for college guys. Try manipulating the options you have in your closet (or on your floor) by adding bright colors and rich textures, like suede and leather. Just try to get some additional opinions on the shoes before you make a big purchase.

Hill Fischer is a senior English major. She may be contacted at [email protected].