Enough!

Party after party seems primarily driven by the goal of providing an “appropriate” setting for the beautiful young women of SMU to wear as little as possible.

Even so, I do not have a problem with every theme party hosted at SMU.

In fact, as a fun-loving and social member of the Greek community, I love the opportunities that mixers provide to dress up in theme and have a fantastic time.

In most cases, I am able to dress in theme while maintaining dignity for myself as a woman of integrity who is worthy of high respect.

However, this past Thursday night, I was completely unable to justify any way to attend a party that was titled “Pimps and Hos” while holding on to any respect for myself.

No matter how I could have dressed, attending this party would have said, “Sure, this is fun, I’ll be a ‘ho’ tonight-it’s only a joke, and it won’t make any difference.” It does make a difference! This is for the girls.

To the women of SMU, I want to ask when the last time was that you heard someone being called a “ho” in a positive way. Probably NEVER! (And, by the way, casually calling someone a “ho” is just as disgusting as saying it with intention.)

Girls call each other “hos” as a slap in the face, a way to degrade another girl’s reputation. Boys call girls “hos” as an insult, a way to say that a girl is not worthy of anything other than easy sex or physical intimacy.

Boys won’t be taking any girl they label as a “ho” home to the family, will they? Have you ever had a friend that cares about you call you a “ho”? Then please don’t let an entire fraternity label you as one-even if it was only for one party, one night.

If that is not enough to convince you, let’s look at the dynamic of this party. We’ve covered the part of “ho,” but what about the part of “pimp”? The blatant double standard here is that both the “ho” and the “pimp” contribute to the same degradation, but to be called a “pimp” is taken as a compliment.

Boys who are called “pimps” are considered, by other guys, to be popular and successful with women. Nothing sounds bad about that, does it? No, of course not.

But being called a “ho”- that’s another thing entirely. Boys smile when they are called “pimps,” and girls cry when they’re called “hos.”

Bear with me on this comparison. Girls, it would be kind of like having a party called “Masters and Slaves” or “Princesses and Servant,” any title that shows a huge separation between the value and position of one person in relation to the other. Which one would you want to be- the Princess or the Servant?

If you’re like most girls, you want to be the Princess! Ironically, I think that one of the reasons girls are willing to go to parties like this is that girls want to be valued and sought after- they want to be the Princess, and in some way this takes the form of being physically desired.

Girls want play it off as just wanting to have fun and be young, but I believe that in almost every girl’s heart this issue goes much deeper.

So let me end by saying that being sought after while you’re dressed as a “ho” at a fraternity party doesn’t bring you any closer to being treated as the Princess you want to be. That only comes from respecting yourself.

I completely understand that when you know that you can very successfully display yourself in a way that captures the attention of men, it can be tempting to do so!

But how much more rewarding would it be to capture the attention of one man of honor with your beautiful face and loving heart, rather than capturing the attention of one hundred men by letting them see everything you have to offer them?

I realize that not everyone who attended this party wanted to portray the image of being a “ho;” (but girls, if you dressed in theme, what did you hope to portray?).

This party points to a sickening idea that permeates our society; and if just one person who reads this is now able to see the problem behind holding such a disgusting party, then I will be so happy.

I hope that SMU is a little bit better because I refused to display my body and myself as a “ho” last Thursday night, but even if it’s not I know I made the right decision for myself and maybe pointed out an issue that was disregarded or unseen by so many.

The reason I have the confidence not to dress provocatively is that I place my faith and trust in my Creator, who wants the very best for all of His children.

I have been redeemed by the love of Christ, and I don’t need the attention of men to provide the joy in my heart.

Katie Gibbens is a sophomore dance major. She can be reached at [email protected].