Happy Parade

You’re so gay. That is so gay. He is so gay. That lecture was so gay. That is the gayest thing I have ever seen in my life. Why do you have to be so gay? I can’t believe how gay that is.

Gay, gay, gay, gay, gay, gay, gay, gay.

I’m really not sure what has happened in the last few months to cause this, but I have heard the term “gay” used more often than ever before in my life. I’m not sure if there was some sort of virus that hit the United States while I was away causing everyone to use the word “gay” at least twice in every sentence. Perhaps my concern is completely unnecessary and, in reality, each time someone uses the word gay they are actually saluting, in one way or another, the rising acceptance of homosexuals/transsexuals/bisexuals in our society. Of course, I would be very, very wrong in this assumption.

I want to discuss this as clearly and as precisely as possible, so I am going to divide those people who use the term “gay” as a basic part of their daily conversational language into two groups:

1) Those who are completely oblivious to the word and any negative ramifications which using the word might cause, and 2) those who are homophobic, for whatever reasons, and desire to publicly denounce “gays” on a day to day basis.

To those members of the first group, please be aware that by using the word “gay” you are potentially hurting someone you don’t know, or, even worse, someone you do know. When you use the word “gay” in a phrase such as “That is so gay,” one infers that you mean “That is so stupid/terrible/dumb.” Therefore, when you might think you are making a completely inane and trivial statement, be aware that someone else might perceive you as saying “I think ‘gay’ people are stupid/terrible/dumb.” I am making you aware of this not as a way to say you are all bad people; rather, we must all be aware that when we speak, we are making statements about ourselves.

You might be a terribly accepting person with a friend or friends of various sexual orientations, but when you use a word like “gay” to imply something negative you are presenting yourself as negative and close-minded.

To the second group, please don’t interpret this as an attempt to change your beliefs concerning homosexuality. I don’t pretend to have that sort of power.

While discussing this topic, we must all be aware that each of us come from very different backgrounds, different religious faiths, different educational experiences, and that in order to progress as a society we cannot resort to fist fights over who accepts homosexuality and who doesn’t.

Many moons ago, I wrote a piece in some ways similar to this concerning our university’s nondiscrimination clause. I argued that in regards to nondiscrimination we must not focus specifically on our difference in belief on one matter or another; rather, we should be unified in our attempt to make all people feel safe and, hopefully, welcome.

To those members of the second group, I urge you to first look at our university’s nondiscrimination clause. For the same reasons that we don’t say (though some of us still do) the words nigger, spik or chink, we must not use the word “gay” to refer to something negative. As we do not draw swastikas with our fingers in the dust on someone’s car window, we must not write “Gay!”

I know this is a touchy subject, and I know that many of us would rather sweep the whole thing under the rug and forget about it. But that’s not possible. For all of eternity I am sure we will be worrying about who’s doing what to whom. I guess it’s just a part of our nature.

In any case, we can take steps forward in our attempt to function better as a campus and as a society by exterminating derogatory statements made by using the word “gay.” Of course, if you’re looking for a synonym of happy or jolly, knock your socks off.