Ask Nell in Spain
Q: Dear Nell,
I am a second-year ‘Stang and am having no luck with the ladies. Where is the best place to meet a girl and how should I go about asking her out?
– Curious
A: Dear Curious,
While it would be easiest to ask some of the guys on the trip about their “lady-catching skills,” the SMU girls in Spain agree (after a recent trip) that even the guys abroad here need some work on their game. Don’t feel bad. This is probably one of the most common questions I am asked.
Asking out a girl is all your choice. Do you want to be subtle or put your ass on the line?
I personally believe that life is too short to miss out on meeting someone. Girls appreciate honesty and a straightforward attitude. Now that you have your hook baited, you need to find out where all the fish are. Where you can find girls depends completely on what kind of girl you want. If you are out for the fun-crazy-wild-party type, check out the local bar and party scene, like the Elbow Room or Minc off Exhibition. If you’re not 21 or unwelcome at the Green Elephant, try some sorority parties. There are plenty of ladies, of whom at least a few are out to meet guys. If you are looking for someone with a common interest or someone involved in school, try getting involved in Student Foundation, Program Council, or other organizations with high girl populations. If you are in desperate need of a “real lady,” a certain sexpert in Spain informed me of several gentlemen’s clubs that are BYOB but well worth a six pack of Natty Light. Good luck, and may you charm all the girls.
Q:Dear Nell,
I am gay and in my class there’s this very attractive young man. Very, very attractive. Scale of 1-10, 10. I was wondering how could I find out if he’s gay or interested in me without dropping any big hints about my sexual orientation or my infatuation with him.
– Secretly Interested
A:Dear Secretly Interested,
Questions like this make me desperately miss my gay best friend at home. If you want to know if he’s gay without talking to him, ask yourself these questions: Does he have an impeccable taste in clothing and style? Is he articulate and well-spoken? Does he always seem to have attractive girls around him? If you answered ‘yes’ to these questions, your man may be gay. Of course, the better approach is always the straightforward one. If you suspect he may be gay, be upfront and tell him your feelings. If you are worried about ‘outing’ him in public, send an e-mail to his SMU account. That way, neither the asking nor the telling has to be painful for either party. Happy hunting.
Q: Dear Nell,
Before my long-distance boyfriend and I were dating exclusively, he “hooked up” with one of my friends. I found out about it and confronted him. We realized that we needed to define our relationship – and have been dating ever since. That was six months ago, and I have forgiven them both, but this week he’s visiting her and some of our other mutual friends in another state. I can’t help but feel uneasy thinking about them getting wasted together. Should I call and tell him how I feel?
– Paranoid
A: Dear Paranoid,
Your feelings are valid. My advice to you is to call him and voice your concerns. If you keep all of these emotions inside, whether validated or not, you will most likely end up lashing out at him. Try not to be confrontational in your conversation, but rather share your feelings with him.
