For all the jokes about IRS agents being ruthless savages sucking our money out of our bank accounts like vampires sucking blood out of one’s veins, taxes really aren’t so bad for a poor, married, college student like myself. If you’re like my dad and pay some 30 percent of your income in marginal taxes, it really sucks to be you come April 15th. But, if you’re like me, you already had all of your withholding refunded to you in the form of a direct deposit into your checking account. So there are some perks to being relatively poor. Of course, I think in reality that I’d rather be in the highest tax bracket than the lowest, but, as far as the principle of the thing goes, it’s nice being in the lower bracket. Let’s just say that there definitely aren’t any perks to being in the higher tax brackets. If I’m not mistaken, my dad can’t even qualify for the tax benefits associated with an IRA. Basically, my dad can’t qualify for any tax breaks. He can claim itemized deductions and capital gains/losses, but that’s about it.In light of my dad’s deplorable state when it comes to tax season, it’s nice when the standard deduction is about twice what you could have itemized. Similarly, it’s nice when your tuition costs half of your yearly income, because it’s deductible, too. I even got an education credit. Throw in the exemptions for my wife and myself, and our combined taxable income was whittled down to a whopping $500. Or was it $5,000? I can’t remember, and $500 sounds better, so I’ll stick with that. Anyway, the point is that I paid $0 in taxes and got all of my withholdings back in the form of a refund.That is, I got all of my federal income tax withholdings back in my refund. That doesn’t mean I didn’t pay a substantial amount of money to the government in the form of Medicare and Social Security taxes. That wouldn’t be so bad if it didn’t look like I’ll never be able to cash in on Medicare or Social Security. (But I won’t rant here because I’m supposed to be focusing on the upside.) Of course, it’s not like the government handed me free money. Sure, I didn’t pay any income taxes, but the money that was refunded to me was money that they were essentially borrowing from me for the past year. I literally gave the federal government an interest-free loan. I wish somebody would give me an interest-free mortgage. But we can’t all be the federal government, can we? Oh wait, aren’t we all the federal government? We the people? So, for my token praising of good things, tax refunds get a good pat on the back. But now I have a question for anyone who might be bored enough to have read through my ramblings thus far. I just purchased my first home this past March. The newly initiated “First Time Homebuyer’s Tax Credit” therefore allows me to receive 10 percent of the cost of my home in the form of a tax credit (because my home was so cheap – there’s a limit to the tax credit for more expensive homes). The original form of this credit was such that one had to pay it back over subsequent tax years. The new version, passed in February, makes no such restriction. In short, even though I didn’t owe any income taxes this year, the IRS has been authorized to give me 10 percent of the cost of my home in one lump sum. Additionally, even though I bought my home in 2009, I can amend my 2008 return to get this credit immediately. Any sane person would understandably be ecstatic about the prospect of receiving such a large amount of money as a no-strings-attached handout, and I was when I first heard about the tax credit. However, the more I think about it, the more I wonder if claiming the credit would be justified. I’m not so sure I agree with the principle or extent of the stimulus packages being pushed through right now. I don’t know how I feel about our government simply printing more money so that I can get 10 percent off the purchase of my home. My dad used to tell me that nothing is free, and that leaves me wondering who would be paying for my handout.When all is said and done, 10 percent of the purchase price of my home is less than pocket change- more like pocket lint- in comparison to the hundreds of billions of dollars being allocated to the various forms of bailouts and economic stimulus programs being proposed and enacted. Nevertheless, do I really want to add to the noise? I’m afraid that if I claim my tax credit I’ll feel like I was the straw that broke the camel’s back if the government’s plan doesn’t go according to plan. So what do you think? Should I take the credit and run, take the credit and donate it to charity, simply fail to claim the credit, send the amended return to the Treasury with a note explaining why I don’t want their free money? I’d love to hear your opinion.

Matt Brumit is a junior humanities major. He can be reached for comment at [email protected].