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War with Iraq drinking game

HILARY HIRSCHFELD

March 28, 2003

Drink when . . .

there’s an explosion in downtown Baghdad.

President Bush says “innocent civilians.”
2x if they are pictured.
3x if they are pictured with guns.

a news correspondent appears wearing fatigues.
2x if it’s Ted Koppel complete with helmet and goggles.
3x if it’s Geraldo Rivera complete with an AK-47.

a journalist is interrupted by the sounds of a fighter jet taking off or landing.

Iraq launches a SCUD that they “don’t have.”
2x if the missle’s launched at Kuwait.
3x if the missle’s launched at France.

the United States terror level changes.
4x if it changes to “rainbow.”

the pope prays for peace.
2x if the pope prays for the United States.
4x if the pope prays to Allah.

an anchor praises the new system of embedding journalists with military units.
2x if Iraqi troops shoot at an embedded journalist.
3x if Iraqi troops shoot at Geraldo Rivera.
4x if Iraqi troops shoot at anyone from MTV.
6x if the embedded reporter shoots back at Iraqi troops.

someone says “Shock and Awe.”
2x if you are actually shocked and/or awed.

Saddam Hussein addresses Iraq.
2x if it is actually current footage.
3x if it is actually Saddam Hussein.

Bush addresses the nation to justify the war.
2x if Bush accuses Iraq of harboring nuclear weapons.
3x if Bush accuses Iraq of harboring “nukyuler” weapons.

someone refers to weapons of mass destruction.
2x if the United States uses weapons of mass destruction against Iraq.
Finish the bottle if Iraq uses them against the United States.

The Daily Campus

The Daily Campus

The Daily Campus

War with Iraq drinking game

The Daily Campus