It’s Thursday night; you’re shaking your thang on the dance floor at Home Bar to some rap medley [or is it five 80s songs in a row?] You’ve had some cheap drinks in you and you’re just trying to avoid getting knocked to the ground by another lame fight. All of a sudden, the twinkling of the disco ball’s light illuminates the face of an extremely attractive guy/girl across the dance floor.
“Omigod,” you think- your maybe you say because that last shot of tequila just hit you. “What?” your friend asks. [Yeah, you said it out loud.] “That is the most attractive guy/girl I’ve ever seen. I must have him/her tonight.” So what do you do? Do you saunter across the dance floor and begin conversation, hoping to get a number? Are you just in the mood to mug down tonight? Or do you discreetly find out whom his/her friends are to find out “what the deal is” with him/her?
This day in age, the possibilities are truly endless. We live in the 21st century, where women are supposed to be strong and free. There is no difference between the typical male and female role that we have progressed so far from since the 1950s. Or have we?
Is chivalry still the ultimate answer?
What are the rules [if any] when playing the “game” of love, lust or just mugging it down? It seems that although women have long fought for equality, we still want to be picked up by a guy, made to feel special and not like another “friend” [because who really needs another one of those?]. In fact, most of the girls I spoke with refuse to call a guy they are at all interested in.
“I never call guys,” said senior Kacky Pritchard. “My high school boyfriend that I dated for four years, I still don’t call him; he calls me.” Pritchard said that guys should be aggressive when it comes to picking up girls. After all, aren’t they always pictured as the dominant sex?
My sister had a different perspective on things: “You just have to be honest,” she said, “because guys like that, even if you feel like a dork.” As you can see, honesty runs in our family. Even though my sister is a senior in high school, she does have a point. Although there is a limit on the honesty card [I wouldn’t recommend coming right out and saying “I think we would have beautiful babies” when you just met the person.], but in order to flirt with someone and let them know you are interested, you have to show you’re fun and that they’ll have fun with you. Cruella Deville never got very far with the boys, you know?
Games are about personal accomplishments, testing your abilities on scoring a phone number, or reassuring yourself you still “got it.” Hell, we all have to be willing to give a little to get a lot.
Ericka Johannesson, a senior history major, said “playing games can get irritating and frustrating but I think especially in the beginning of a relationship it’s important to not seem too available and keep an element of unpredictability.” Essentially, it’s what makes a relationship exciting. If a guy or girl seems too available, or if he makes it apparent he’s totally into you, the excitement of someone new quickly fads away. There is a difference, a fine line really, between keeping it exciting and being sketchy. No one wants to get shut out time and time again or waste energy on someone who is always busy.
Ashley Jorgenson, a junior print journalism major, said playing games gets out of control. “It gets to the point that people are too busy playing games- life would be a lot easier without them.” Jorgenson said that dating someone is often clouded with games, creating circumstances that appear unattractive and receive unwarranted goodbyes.
Pritchard said her brother is under the impression that if a girl is into him, she should initiate the call, not him. Although all girls may inhale sharply at this comment, who’s to say it’s not true?
Girls across the board agree: if a guy is into you, he’ll ask for your number. [Hasn’t everyone and their mom read He’s Just Not That Into You yet? Maybe we’re convincing ourselves this is true.] Despite begin in the 21st century; chivalry remains alive and well practiced. And certainly, all girls feel that it is solely the guy’s responsibility to call the girl after a hook-up session. In fact, one more little rule girls consider holding true: if you’re hanging out sober with no chance of alcohol [or on a Sunday or Monday night, according to junior Julie Porter] things are getting pretty serious. A pre-game party on a Thursday night does not warrant dating status.
There are preconceived notions that males should hold the door for girls, pay for a first dinner out, or buy her a drink, especially in the South. There arte certain unwritten rules that should be followed. My dad will not let any of us girls leave the house unless the guy picking us up comes to the door. He thinks [and I agree whole heartedly] it shows respect, not only for the girl but also for her parents. Is this part of playing the game?
Look at Will Smith in “Hitch;” he created opportunities, not fraudulent images of his clients. This is the whole reasoning behind playing the game- they create little fantasy opportunities of flirting. Games do not guarantee a future or long-run with someone but open doors for continuing conversations and possibly a limited future [how does one night sound?] Essentially, even if you think you don’t play games or don’t’ think you’re “smooth,” you are actually using that “smooth”-ness [or lack thereof] as a game. Unless of course you think you have game and really don’t.
You don’t have to play games to keep the opposite interested; you just have to be willing to play games to get them interested.