Remember as you read

I’ve known that I would have this column since late April, yet it has taken me three months to decide on how I want to open it. Honestly, as I’m writing this sentence, I still don’t have much of an idea, but I don’t think it will matter.

I do know that my idea for this column is to make it into a little insight into the person that I am. This is the reason it is titled “Minority of a Minority.” Because that is how I see myself or, it could be argued, how I learned to see myself.

Actually, a large reason this column is titled this way is because Jonathan Dewbre, the commentary editor, thought my original name, “Cream of Whoop-Ass Soup for the Soul,” might be a little too upfront. I figured that like the column, and quite honestly, its author, the readers would either get it or they wouldn’t. I still don’t think he got what I was going for, though I can understand why he would see it the way he did. There was much more (intended) parody of the “Chicken Soup” series than animosity in that title, but, in a way, I’m glad he rejected it. The current title is much more fitting.

For those of you that haven’t read anything I have written before, one thing you might notice is that I often like to write as if I am speaking to you, as compared to writing for you. That’s deliberate. The one thing I certainly try my hardest not to do is write down to you. There are enough people who write commentaries and letters to the editor who do that, and though I don’t know if you hate it as much as I do, I’m sure you can live without me doing it as well.

And, in a seeming contradiction, I don’t believe in political correctness. I think getting a point across is more important than making sure everyone who reads my column is happy. In fact, let me say this right now: Chances are, at some point during the semester, you will be angry about something I say. Most likely, though, you will like something I write too. In short, don’t let something I say completely turn you off to the column. (I tune in to The 700 Club every once in a while just to reconfirm my conclusion that the hosts are idiots.)

Another thing to remember while reading this column is that the only person I speak for is me. I say this because if you identify as a member of a political party (I’ve been a member of the Libertarian Party for nearly four years, and have mentioned my affiliation a number of times previously), sometimes you can unwittingly become a spokesperson. As much as I tried to be aware of that before when I wrote, I want to shake it for this column unless I explicitly mention otherwise. Even if I can’t, I know that I can’t possibly be as bad of a voice for the Libertarians than Ted “Chappaquiddick” Kennedy or John “I lost an election to a dead guy” Ashcroft are for their respective parties.

I invite you, over the course of the semester, to e-mail me to discuss any one of my columns, to tell me what a wonderful person I am, or to tell me where to go. Keep in mind though, that when you do, the good folks at Yahoo! Mail have provided me with a “reply” button, and I will be as kind or unkind as you were.

I think this column will be a lot of fun for me. At the very least, it will finally give me the chance to write about some things I’ve really wanted to for a while. Hopefully you’ll enjoy reading it, and the little bit of my “quirky sense of humor” (as my high school biology teacher called it) that you’ll see won’t completely throw you off.

I’m going to end this column early, but I’m certain this’ll be the first and the last time. Take care, and have a good semester.