Who’s behind this Twitter account? Is it in anyway officially connected to SMU?
Someone very close to Peruna. I don’t want to reveal anything more than that so that the page is about Peruna, not the writer behind the screen. Not official though.
Why did you create this Twitter account?
After being the mascot for 78 some years, I figured it was time to get into the 21st century. After all, aren’t we in the middle of the “Second Century” campaign? Listen here you whippersnappers: back in MY day the only “tweets” came from the birds that lived on my ranch!
(Translation: I don’t know a whole lot about Twitter, hence the week late reply to your request!)
What’d the Fordham ram do to make you kill him?
Well, there were rumors about a “Death Penalty” flying around, so I figured they were counting on me to carry it out. There can be serious consequences if you cheer against the Mustangs, you know.
What led to you kicking Bevo that one time?
Poor guy is always drugged up at the games. He told me he was clean, but obviously wasn’t at that game so I tried to snap him out of it. I apologized for it later. He told me that he thinks those Silver Spur guys are slipping stuff in his water trough. Why would they sedate their own mascot!? If any of MY Handlers tried that…well…we all saw what happened to the Fordham ram.
When Ke$ha comes, are you going to drink some Peruna tonic with her?
Well, the last time I talked with Ke$ha on Skype, she told me:
“After the show, brush my teeth with a bottle of Tonic
Cause when I come to play at SMU, I’m really gonna rock it.”
Interpret that as you will. Yeah, she talks in rhyme a lot. She’s a few fountains short of a campus, if you know what I mean. It’s been a while though, PerunaNet and Skype don’t get along, so she might have changed her plans since then.
Come to think of it…PerunaNet doesn’t really get along with ANYTHING.
What’s your major?
Some students told me that getting an MRS is the way to go…but I know I’m going to be a B.A. I don’t even know what a B.A. is, but I figure it describes me pretty accurately.
What’s your opinion on the football team? This past season?
They’re great. Love them to death. Especially Chris Banjo; he always comes over and says hi to me after we sing Varsity. I’ll let you in on a little secret on Kyle Padron. I’m no Simon Cowell, but even I can tell that dude needs to get some singing lessons. Can’t we hook him up with someone over in Meadows? The offensive line’s eardrums would thank us.
Last season was so fun. I’ve gotta admit though: all that running sure wore me out. I think I’ve run more in the last two years than I had in the last 11 seasons combined…I’ve been around since ’97 you know.
What’s your opinion on the two mustangs, Liberty and Justice?
I feel kind of bad for them…It must suck to have once been a mustang but then…poor guys…Madeline Pickens found them, chopped off their manhood and trained them into tame little geldings. A true mustang like me would never let someone put a saddle on them!
What’d you think of Hawaii?
Best. Trip. Ever.
Judith Banes made me an awesome Hawaiian shirt, so I fit right in. When we landed on the island, there were people at the airport giving us leis. The team and I all got some. June Jones didn’t take one though; he already had one that he wears all the time at games and stuff.
Oh! Best memory? I learned to hula dance. Me and Matt Szymanski put on some grass skirts and hula danced with some Hawaiian girls at the luau party the school put on for us.
Blast from the Past: You once rode in a taxi in Los Angeles before a UCLA game. How’d you manage to fool the driver until you were halfway to your destination?
Funny story there, actually. Back in the good ol’ days when you could travel with more than 3.5 ounces of liquid, I had a limo. Traveled around cities with it when me and the Mustang Band went out of town to games, you see. That day, my driver apparently overslept and got stuck in the crazy LA gridlock before the game, so I had to call a cab to get to the game in time. I didn’t want to let my team down. The guy was kind of weird and smelled like air freshener, but I got to the game in time, so I guess all’s well that ends well.
What do you think of the new football field turf?
I haven’t been there to check it out yet. President Turner emailed me his concept drawings that he sent the builders, but I have a feeling that Steve Orsini and June Jones’ won’t like the idea of having a fountain underneath each goal post. That probably got vetoed.
What’s your opinion about letting students have a concealed weapon on campus?
I don’t think America cares much about my opinion on the subject. They won’t even let me vote. So much for “universal suffrage!”
Peruna Handlers: Hate ’em or Love ’em?
Love em: they’re my wingmen. We hang out all the time. Although, some times they can be jerks: they don’t always let me eat the grass when we boulevard. SMU grass is kind of like the filet mignon of foliage. You should try it sometime.
How do you handle bathroom ettiquette?
I can handle myself just fine thank you very much. Have you ever watched the geldings during the national anthem? That brown one (I never remember which one’s which. I have more important things to think about) relieves himself during it every single game. If I wore a watch, I could set it to him!
The rockets red glare and the bombs bursting in air may have given Francis Scott Key proof that our flag was still there, but the stench coming from the 50 yard line gives our football team proof that Liberty (or Justice)’s lunch is still there.
