Q: Dear Stacy,
There’s this girl in one of my classes who is really cute and might actually not be your typical SMU girl majoring in her M.R.S. But I have no idea what her name is or how to introduce myself. It’s a big class, and she usually sits near me. Would it be weird or too high school to pass a note? Should I just get over my self-doubt and insecurity and talk to her? – John
A: Dear John,
As endearing as passing a note sounds and plays out in the mind, it can be sophomoric and ineffective. For some reason, the plague of notes containing “Do you like me? Circle: Yes or No” and teasing games of “I like you but I’m not going to acknowledge you” from sixth grade does not disintegrate with age.
And, 10 years later, it looks as though it most likely never will. So, don’t take the back door approach.
Take note of her name first. If you don’t have the slightest clue of what letter her name even starts with, try tapping her shoulder or approaching her and talk about an upcoming test in the class. Start with something simple: “Hey. Are you ready for the test Friday?” She’ll probably respond, “No. I haven’t even looked at the book yet.”
And from there do what is natural. Talk about the class or test for a bit and then introduce yourself.
Getting your foot in the door is always the toughest step, and after that, it’s smooth sailing. Don’t expect too much at once. Take baby steps – a little conversation each time you see her. Be confident in yourself and go for it.
Keep a steady voice and don’t give her the chance to detect your self-doubt.
Q: Dear Stacy,
Why do guys avoid beautiful girls?
– Kelsey & Missy
A: Dear Kelsey & Missy,
There are a few possible explanations.
The first one is intimidation. Some guys see beautiful girls as obstacles and don’t want to waste their time on something they think they’ll never get. They think they’re setting themselves up for failure.
The other reason may be related to the impression that beautiful girls are snobby and self-centered, especially since they know it. So, for men, it’s better to avoid them than deal with their “drama.”
Another possibility is that guys assume that you’re already taken. For some reason, most hot girls already have boyfriends. So, men combine all of these factors and consider you a lost cause.
Q: Dear Stacy,
My girlfriend has difficulty finding her “G spot.” Is that normal?
– Marcus
A: Dear Marcus,
Yes. It definitely happens to a lot of people. Most men can find their orgasms at the snap of their fingers, while women must work harder to simply find the climax.
There are solutions, though. So, don’t lose hope!
I would suggest that you begin to pick up “Cosmopolitan” every now and then to find tips on how to re-arouse your sex life.
Here are a few other tips that I read from “Cosmopolitan” when looking for answers for you. Don’t skip over the basics – kissing and, well, foreplay. Don’t rush through it.
There’s a reason why it’s done, and doctors have stated that it will help in the end.
Make sure she is focused. Focused on herself and her goal. Focused on you and taking her there.
Focused on anything sexually related to the two of you that doesn’t involve her “to do list” or any other distractions. Remember to concentrate on her “C-spot,” as “Cosmopolitan” puts it.
Take your time, and don’t think it’s your fault. It’s anatomy.
Stacy Seebode is a senior journalism and dance major. She writes a weeky sex column that apears every Friday. She can be reached at [email protected].
