Narcotics Anonymous is not a glamorous place. The small blue and white building is precariously located near two liquor stores and is across the street from a vacant lot.
Upon entering the building, members are immediately engaged by the numerous posters and hand-written messages hanging on the wall.
To the right of the entrance hangs a white board, celebrating the clean date and successful years of various members. Nancy* has an anniversary coming up. On March 31, she was clean for six years. Linda M. has her nine year anniversary on March 27. The 16 year anniversary for Jasmine W. passed on March 9.
When seated, a slew of slogans are in view to read while waiting for the meeting to begin.
“Surrender Is Only the Beginning
Once We Surrender We Need
To Learn How To Live In The
Peace We Have Found,” or
” Humility is 3-5 min.
Ego is 5-10-15 min.
many have the need to share!        -group conscience 6/10/00,” and
“PLEASE LIMIT
    Your Sharing Time        To 3 Minutes.”
The group’s leader, Steve, and Sam, a member, sit at the table, Harry and another member are in the kitchen and Paul is sitting on the back wall wearing sunglasses with his head down and arms crossed.
After waiting a few minutes, Steve announces it is time to start the Sunday, March 21, 8 p.m. meeting. Five seats out of 70 are occupied.
The meeting starts with a group recitation of the serenity prayer:
“God…
Grant me the serenity to accept
the things I cannot change…
The courage to change
the things I can
And the wisdom to know
the difference.”
Now a moment of silence for “those still in pain.” Although it is not completely silent, because Harry and another member are running the water in the kitchen and their muffled conversation can be heard.
Steve says the meeting is for recovering addicts who meet regularly to help one another with their sobriety.
Harry has returned to his seat, holding a wet towel. He is wearing a black winter cap with the plastic store tag still attached, a camouflage jacket, a dingy white t-shirt, a medical bracelet, gray sweatpants and white tennis shoes. While Steve and Sam read aloud, Harry wipes his face, neck and ears with the towel. He pauses occasionally to snort, blow his nose or look at his bandaged finger, which has a spot of blood.
When Steve and Sam finish their readings they ask Harry if he will read. He agrees and takes off his hat to read “Just for Today,” which, as its title suggests, concerns approaching recovery from addiction one day at a time.
One last reading by Steve and it is time for introductions.
“Harold, addict.”
“I’m Sam, and I’m an addict.”
It is now Paul’s turn, and he is reluctant to speak.
“Corner,” Steve says.
“I’m just listening to ya’ll. I’m just waiting. I’m trying to go home, that’s what I’m trying to do. I’ve got a long way to go.”
Steve says, “You’re sitting in on a meeting. You’ve still got to identify yourself.”
“My name is Paul, and I identify myself as an addict. I’m Paul, and I’m kind of a newcomer to N.A. … I’m fully in recovery… I’m struggling with my own actions.”
“I’m Leo.”
The meeting is now over and it is time to share. Sam says she likes the smaller meetings because she feels more comfortable sharing. She is 20 days clean, and attributes her success to a higher power. She says she was living like an animal, and through the N.A. community she has gained the strength to look herself in the mirror.
“That’s a big deal for a junkie like me.”
Sam captures the attention of everyone in the room, including Paul who now moves to sit at the table with everyone else. After San finishes, he talks about how he uses drugs and alcohol to medicate and numb himself. He says God kept him alive, talked to him and told him to go to church.
“I’m sick, but I haven’t lost grace.”
While Paul speaks, Harry, who is homeless, rearranges his belongings. He goes through his pockets and his white, transparent garbage bag. He has two disposable razors, which he gives to Paul, napkins, an empty mustard bottle, a plastic spoon, garbage and a light bulb.
Sam refreshes her coffee and Steve looks at the time.
Paul has broken the three-minute rule. He has been talking for 17.5 minutes.
After everyone else has spoken, Steve starts sharing.
He says he used to drink exclusively during the weekend. That was how it started. When he got to college, there was a party every night and every day. There would be a party on Thursday, and on Monday he says he would still be partying.
Twelve years ago Steve went to his first N. A. meeting, and today, he leads them.
*The names have been changed to protect the anonymity of the N.A. members.