With Halloween tonight, there are many of you out there thinking, “Man, I dropped the ball. I don’t have a costume.” Is that small voice in the back of your head saying, “It’s not a big deal. I’ll cut holes in a sheet and go as a ghost?” If so, scrap those trite ideas, take some tips from SMU and go as some of the most infamous university personalities.
The first costume available is perfect for those SMU men who rarely attend class. The Jasper Neel costume set comes complete with a bow tie, a pair of glasses and a giant pointing finger. When introducing yourself make sure to use your catch phrase – “Go to class.”
The most popular costume for women this year is the Arlene Manthey “get excited for student activities” package. Complete with an SMU sweatshirt, white tennis shoes and a pixie cut wig, the Arelene is sure to be a hit. Just don’t forget to tell all your friends, in the thickest southern accent you can muster, to “fire up.”
For the sports fans out there, the Phil Bennett costume is the precise fit. To acquire the authentic coach Bennett look, fasten a thick mustache to your upper lip, pull your khaki pants up high above your waist, put on a red SMU polo shirt and pick up a play book. When fellow party goers question you about the current state of the football team you are to reply, “I take full responsibility for everything.” And one last thing, don’t forget that furrowed look on your brow.
Women with an attitude will find going as the Perkins receptionist an ideal getup. With big, blonde Texas hair and the “what, do you want something?” glare you’ll be sure to send your friends slinking away, ashamed of their own existence.
For those students unsatisfied with their careers at SMU, the Chris Peck ensemble is sure to please. Find a suit and throw it on the floor to get it as wrinkled as possible. When making an entrance at a party immediately tell your friends that you are buying them all drinks for the rest of the night. But, halfway through the party you depart, leaving the bill unpaid and your promises broken with your friends stuck having to clean up your mess.
The outrageous women of the Hilltop will find that dressing as Nell Lukosavich, The Mix’s notorious sex and dating columnist, a fun way to spend Halloween night. To achieve the look, hold a reporter’s notebook in one hand while passing out condoms with your other. While giving the most researched sex advice to your friends, throw in a few Spanish words that you picked up spending the semester in Spain.
