Think of your favorite football movie, Rudy, The Replacements,or Remember the Titans. In all of these movies, the players get toexperience a defining moment, a time when they are able to riseabove past performance and meet their potential. Just as importantas those moments, though, is what comes right before it — thepep talk.
When the coach has the players in the locker room, the musicswells and the game is already won before the step on the field. EdBoard would like to take this opportunity to issue a do-it-yourselfpep talk for SMU football players (or for those of you who have afinal tomorrow).
Step 1: Put on your favorite inspirational song and graduallyturn up the volume as you complete steps 2 through 4. Whatever songworks for you is fine. While some might go for the more classic”Eye of the Tiger,” others of you might go for theMonday Night Football theme. When in doubt, whatever the currentsong NBC is using to plug its shows will do (currently”Breath” by Michelle Branch).
Step 2: It would seem that camera panning it also key to thesebuild-ups to moments of triumph. This is a little harder totranslate into real life but it can be done, and the SMU footballteam is worth it. Recreate this key element by standing in one spotand slowly rotating in a circle. Now if you are being faithful infollowing step 1 — gradually turning up your particularinspirational song — this could be tricky with the cord. Fixthis by simply rotating in the opposite direction once your CDplayer cord has wound too tightly around you.
Step 3: The moving and inspirational speech seems daunting atfirst without a team of professional screenwriters at your back,but never fear. Ed Board figures that these inspirational speechesare much like our national anthem — its not so much what yousay as how you say it. As with the anthem, three things are key:pitch, timing and arm movements. A good game-winning speech shouldbe like a roller coaster with lots of rises and falls. Be loud,then allow your voice to shrink back down to a solemn whisper, thenswitch it back up with loud again. Every once in a while insert adramatic pause to impress upon yourself the seriousness of theoccasion. And finally, the arm movements — lots of affirmingand denying arm motions. For added variety, switch between yourright and left arm or, if especially daring, use both. With thesetechniques it doesn’t matter what you are saying, so readaloud from your economics textbook or the cereal box.
Step 4: Finally, be sure and reach up and hit the top of thedoorframe on your way out.
Step 5: Repeat as needed.
While Ed board cannot offer any money-back guarantee that ourfootball season is assured a movie ending — where the prettypeople win, and the guy gets the girl — if nothing else, itshould prove fun to watch others do it after they have had a littletoo much liquid school spirit on the Boulevard.
