Why on Earth would people purposely give themselves an itch, only then to spend their time and money scratching it? That is to say, does it make sense to create an itch for the sole purpose of scratching it? Of course not! And yet we are constantly creating new itches for ourselves, replacing old itches with stronger ones, and delighting in scratching them all day long.
So how do we get rid of these itches? Should we try scratching them until they don’t itch anymore? No! You leave them the hell alone, you stop thinking about them and you devote your time to more meaningful pursuits. Picking at them until they turn raw will only make them worse, and you know it. Remember the chicken pox?
Addiction cannot be cured through the satisfaction of a desire because the desire will always boomerang back. In other words, you aren’t going to magically quit smoking forever after finishing this one last cigarette, or this pack, or after your birthday. The birthday excuse especially makes me laugh – as if everything will somehow change once you call yourself a year older. Only by abandoning our afflicted desires RIGHT NOW will the cycle of want begin to slow down and eventually cease.
Last week I talked about simplicity, but I was vague and convoluted. I now realize that specific examples are necessary for me to get my point across. But just to reiterate my point: Simplifying our lives by reducing our expectations, and therefore our disappointments, MUST lead to a greater overall sense of satisfaction. (Read that last sentence a few times; it’s pretty important).
Quitting is not easy. I’m a smoker (still), so believe me when I say that I know how hard it is to quit, but I’ve talked to friends who have quit, and none of them regret it. Go figure. Some people say that smoking relieves stress, but it really just relieves the addiction, the itch, that quality which is not necessary. Some people like the social aspect (the “smokers’ club”), but there are plenty of healthy ways to relate to people.
How many Americans are addicted to TV? Damn near all of them. It’s an escape from our boring lives into the worlds of interesting people with witty things to say. That’s not to say that all television is bad, but too much “Real World & Road Rules Challenge” will surely lead to a mushy brain. I’m sure there are better things to spend time doing.
And what about all those hours wasted playing “Guitar Hero?” You could have learned to play the real guitar in that period of time, and I know you’ve thought of that before and laughed about it. WELL IT’S TRUE! Try getting a real life. However, I have nothing against “Guitar Hero” and all of the people who have spent over 48 solid hours playing it (me).
And how many silly relationships have ended in heartache? All of them except maybe the one you’re in right now. And just you wait, because it’s going to get ugly sooner or later. Fact: Relationships always end bad, because, otherwise, they wouldn’t end. Why do we always think that we’d be happier with someone? Could it be because we don’t like ourselves? Is it just the sex? How about the sense of security in always having someone around? Any of those reasons will lead to an unhealthy relationship, in addition to preventing us from strengthening our personal character. Period.
I’m not saying that we should cut out relationships entirely; that would be criminal. You need those life experiences of joy and sorrow. All I’m saying is relationships are, by definition, emotionally exhausting, physically expensive and financially stressful, and one should therefore avoid meaningless pursuits.
The first step toward change is awareness. Look at the individual pieces of your life, and ask “Why?” Look at the cost and the benefit in your actions, and remove anything when its bad outweighs its good. And for God’s sake, be honest with yourself. Don’t be afraid of change just because it does not happen over night. Of course you’ll want to turn back to your addiction in times of weakness, and there’s nothing wrong with minor indulgences. I’m aiming at changing habits and general lifestyles.
This is some heavy stuff. If you have any questions feel free to e-mail me; let’s start a conversation! Or just talk to anyone older than you. They tend to know a thing or two about life.
Just remember to keep life as simple as possible, and cut out any complicated, unnecessary addictions. You won’t regret it! Good luck!
About the writer:
Keven O’Toole is a junior philosophy major and can be reached at [email protected].
