Take me out to the ball game. Take me out to the crowd. Buy mesome peanuts and crackerjacks. Don’t let Steve Bartman evercome back.
Moron. Jerk. Idiot. Imbecile. What an utter fool. The sheerstupidity of his “mistake” sickens every Cubs fan tothe core.
The most hated man in Chicago didn’t show up for work onWednesday morning because he couldn’t face his coworkers, orfor that matter, any of his fellow commuters on the L. Forgettaking his chances with a cabbie that might be a rabid Cubsfan.
Steve Bartman, 26, locked himself away (after a public apology)in his own personal hell of embarrassment, self-pity and shame.Maybe he really did just come down with the flu; or sympathy painsfor his beloved team and the die-hard fans that now despisehim.
Perhaps he should go online and investigate real estateopportunities in Miami.
After Mr. Bartman thwarted the attempt of Cubs left fielderMoises Alou to catch Luis Castillo’s foul ball, a couple ofMarlins made a pact in the shadows of the visitors’dugout.
Marlins catcher Mike Redmond turned to his teammate, firstbaseman Derrek Lee, and said, “Okay, let’s make thatkid famous.”
But wait, no, that’s not right. You mean theseprofessional athletes actually plan to play well, learn to reactunder pressure and take advantage of every opportunity to win Game6 of the National League Championship?
No, it was the idiot’s fault. Any other Cubs fan wouldhave had enough composure, sitting in the front row of the leftfield stands, giddy with excitement (or maybe the intoxication of acold one), to just let the ball fall tightly into the pocket ofAlou’s glove.
The game wasn’t affected by Alex Gonzalez’s error,or the fact that Mark Prior allowed five runs. It wasn’t thestellar pitching of Kyle Farnsworth once the Marlins took thelead.
Nope, it was that dolt who got excited and deflected the ball.He, and the Cub’s “curse,” of course areultimately to blame for forcing a final Game 7. It’s assimple as that.
We know of one person in Chicago who had more riding on theoutcome of last night’s game than a ballpark’s worth offans.