We haven’t been enjoying movies as much lately and it’s because of you guys. Not you personally, but your poor movie-going manners. Here’s a top ten list of annoying habits that drive us crazy.
1. You know how much movies cost. Why not go ahead and have your cash or credit card out so you’re ready when it’s your turn at the ticket booth? It would make the line go a lot faster- and then none of us will miss the previews.
2. Turn off your damn cell phone. No one wants to hear the polyphonic version of “Smack That” in the middle of Izzie’s death scene in “The Fountain.” Turning it on silent is acceptable, but don’t leave it on vibrate- we can still hear it vibrating in the row behind us.
3. Be quiet with your snacks. We love popcorn and Milk Duds as much as the next moviegoer. But when you start smacking your food in our ears, it really takes away from the ambiance of the movie. Also, the sound of you moving your straw up and down against the drink lid is like nails on a chalkboard.
4. We know a lot of DC readers don’t have children, but you do have younger siblings. We know you really want to see “Saw III,” but maybe it isn’t the best idea to expose your 7-year-old sister to graphic violence and language. It’s unnerving for the rest of the audience to see children viewing adult fare, and it’s irresponsible on your part.
5. Shut up. We don’t care how many times you’ve seen the movie. We don’t care how “tight” that one part is or how hot that one girl is from that one place that you can’t remember the name of. We don’t need to hear your opinions on every excruciating detail splashed on the screen. Save the chit-chat for the drive home.
6. Keep your hands to yourself. We’re sure your date is “super hott!” Yeah… with two “t’s.” But your making out is more than distracting. It’s disturbing. Plus, you’re not 13 years old anymore waiting for your mom to pick you up.
7. Keep your feet on the floor. We all like to relax while watching a movie, but if you need to recline that badly, go home, rent a movie, and take a nap. We can see your feet protruding at the top of the seat next to us with our peripheral vision, and wearing flip flops and exposing us to the interesting smells coming from that area of your body doesn’t help matters.
8. Treat the employees with respect. It’s not their fault if the sound suddenly cuts out during your movie or if “RV” wasn’t the feel-good movie of the year you expected. Demanding your money back is childish. If something really and truly ruins your experience (such as technical difficulties), odds are, the staff will know about it and offer free passes.
9. When you leave the theater, throw away your empty snacks and drink containers. There’s nothing more disgusting than stepping on your discarded Junior Mints box with bits of gooey chocolate still clinging to it.
10. Wait until you get to the car to discuss major plot twists in the movie you just saw. There’s nothing worse than waiting in line to buy a ticket to “The Departed” and hearing some guy and his buddies walking out of the theater talking about how sweet it was when everyone “totally” died.
Just follow our tactful tips and you’ll be a film-going connoisseur in no time.
